Today, we of the PowerDNS team are ready to unveil our bold new product strategy: GreenDNS.
Admitting the following is quite painful, but to make a better world we must muster the courage to be brutally honest: DNS is dirty. In fact, it’s absolutely filthy. Too long have we been accomplices to the industry in covering up this fact. This is, in fact, one of the main drivers in the development of DNS-over-TLS and especially DNS-over-HTTPS. The reasoning was, if no one can see the DNS, nobody will notice how obscenely foul it really is.
No longer. No longer can we look at ourselves in the mirror while continuing to contribute to this squalor. For the sake of our children and their children, DNS must go GREEN.
And so, today, we make a promise. Like the high-profile tech giants, we will strive for carbon-neutrality, but without the privacy invasion. Specifically, to be the premier purveyor of premium, carbon-neutral DNS solutions by 2030.
In the spirit of our new-found transparency, we would like to share which solutions/technologies we will be exploring as part of this product initiative:
- The blockchain, obviously. But only if it’s solar-powered.
- Anti-phishing, as the world is obviously being over-phished.
- Carbon-capture technologies that can be bolted on servers, as these suck in a lot of air.
- No more CI/CD. The lights flicker in some cities when one of us pushes a branch. Our software quality might suffer a bit, but your children will thank you.
- Just charging more for our software and buying carbon credits.
We know, the list is short, but to be honest after all the repentance we were a bit spent.
Anyway, when armageddon comes and the survivors are huddled around campfires in the empty wastelands, reflecting on how everything went so wrong, at least no one will say: “it was DNS.”